It is a brand new day and my heart still hurts. Yesterday feels like it should have been a dream as we should have our sweet Sterling laying in her bed or trotting along around the house. She was notorious for getting up between 4-5AM and wanting to hang out so it is no surprise that my body woke up this morning at 4:45AM with the desire to go hang out with Sterling. 😦
Every dog touches my heart in a different way and they all take a piece of it when they leave me. Sterling truly showed me the meaning of undying love and loyalty and I promised her the day she walked in that we would provide that for her as her other family had not. I promised her I would provide her with anything she needed to enjoy life and that she was truly a part of our family.
Sterling taught me that everyday is TRULY a precious gift to us. As my head and hand laid on Sterling’s chest for her very last breath yesterday, I know that I will always think of her when I take a breath and when I enjoy each and every brand new day.
This is a guest blog post from Mike, ENJOY!
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So, today, we had to say goodbye to our sweet old lady dog Sterling. Sterling came to us at the beginning of May through the Mile High Weim Rescue when her family of sixteen years took her to the vet to be euthanized, just because she was old. The rescue saw that she was in very good health and had some life in her. Brooke, the foster coordinator, told me about her and I knew she would be living out her days here as I have a soft spot for the old ladies!
Sterling was wonderful, a beautiful soul. She slept a lot and every time we came home, we would have to stand over her and make sure she was still breathing. She had some trouble getting around, but it never stopped her. One sunny day in June, I took her out front with me while I read a book, I figured she would lay by my side. I was definitely wrong. I couldn’t keep her next to me. I kept watching her explore our cul de sac. I would walk out, bring her back, and we would start the routine again. She loved walks and she would let Emma hold her leash, which Emma LOVED! I would always see glimpses of Sterling’s youth. In her trying to get out the front door, trying to eat anything she thought was in your hand, sniffing at the counters, and even two days ago snatching my dinner plate off of the table.
Last night, she started showing signs of fading. I slept downstairs near her. We realized this morning that she needed to go to the vet. We found out that she was bloated, her stomach was twisted, and she had a tumor. We then made the sad decision to put her down. We only had her for three months and we knew it could happen any day, but it did not make it any easier!
Which brings me to the moment I was dreading tonight…telling Cara and Emma. Brooke was at an event, so I had to deliver the news. Within a minute of walking in, they asked where Sterling was. I sat them down for dinner and told them something along these lines:
Sterling had to leave us and we would not be able to see her anymore. She was very sick, had a really big owwie and had died. I told them through some tears that I missed Sterling and that mommy and daddy were sad that we could not see her anymore. That is when something I couldn’t predict happened.
Cara’s biggest worry? “Sterling forgot her bed” (Which made me break down a little more)
She then said, “Don’t be sad”, then her and Emma got up and gave me a hug and kiss. Followed by Cara saying, “Now eat your pizza!”
Still feeling that they didn’t understand the situation, I asked if they needed anything or had any questions. Cara again, “Do you need anything? Do you need a treat?” Emma: “You need to make a daddy shake (Chocolate protein shake)”
Cara also decided to name one of her stuffed animals Sterling and the ceramic pug statue that floats between their rooms and into beds is now named Sterling too.
Finally, to end this talk at dinner, Cara, definitely asked, “Is there a new dog coming?”
At bedtime, Cara asked me if I was still sad. I said Yes, can you make me feel better?
She said she could give me a hug and kiss, which she did. She then said her turtle man (Ninja Turtle) would give me a hug, which he did. She then told me I could take turtleman to bed with me to make me feel better. Then followed it up with, “If he bites you, you can turn him into a salamander”
I cannot put in to words how proud I am of my girls for their love, compassion, and how they prioritized making me feel better. It makes me realize that we’re doing something right. I did not know what to expect in telling them about losing Sterling, but I had no idea it would be this level of compassion that adults rarely show. Thank you Cara and Emma!
And of course thank you Sterling!
To my darling Cara and Emma 